seaslug

Completely random

I've been working on the units at the hospital this week, making sure there are no issues with the software upgrade we did over the weekend.

A nurse called me into a patient room to ask a question and then, because the patient was on suicide watch and the nurse couldn't leave the room and was by herself, and maybe lonely, she kind of verbally exploded. This is what she said, at 50,000 miles an hour:
"i was working on er but then i started working on all these other units too and i also went to school for dental assistant so i was doing that for awhile and also i was working for nvs and they had me traveling where do you live? so you know shamokin and down that way so nvs had me traveling around northumberland county and they had me going to milton and i said 'milton is in northumberland county?' i had no idea northumberland county went that far the pay they give me for mileage wouldn't cover the wear and tear on my car wasn't worth it my tom said my car was losing power and i told him he was crazy my car gets great mileage i was getting about 32 i've been driving monte carlos for years i had an alero once that car was a piece of sh*t i took it back to the dealership what do you call that, a lemon? i called it some other piece of fruit and the dealer said, 'you mean a lemon?' i should have enacted the lemon law so my car was losing power going up the mountain it went from 60 to 50 to 40 and i asked my tom and his friend what would cause that and he said it was either the fuel filter or the catalytic converter or the other stuff i had already had fixed i had gotten a letter in the mail from gm and it wasn't a recall but there were some problems with the catalytic converters and i took it to the garage and they said there was nothing wrong with it and charged me a service fee and i showed them the letter and told them i wasn't supposed to be charged anything and my tom said i should call gm about that and maybe i can still do something about that lemon law for the alero my son hasn't gotten his journeyman yet he's going to school and working pp&l pays for your school this summer when he does his extern he'll maybe get his cdl he's one of eight who will get that he says 'mom, i'm not sure yet if i'm one of the eight.' they have 25 in the class but they don't want to send all 25 to get cdl because they don't need all those people driving those big trucks if my son becomes a lineman with them he'll be set for life making about $28 an hour i refinanced my son's car to get a cheaper rate i don't have any young kids they're 23, 25, 28, so the overtime is nothing i get the bonuses working these other units."
The woman did. not. breathe. While the nurse was 'sploding at me, the patient, a teenage boy, was playing a video game and it didn't look like he was paying any attention at all but when the nurse started talking about her car and asked 'what's that thing that makes a car lose power' the kid, without turning away from the video game or blinking an eye, blurted out 'fuel filter!'

I was completely exhausted by this experience.

The other day I was in the mall, in the little dining room of Dino's Pizza. It has a smoking section and two women were there, each with a lit cigarette. Both of them looked pretty rough around the edges and both had fierce whiskey voices. One was talking on a cell phone. "I can't hear you very well. You dere? You dere? You dere? What? You can't hear me very well?"

The other woman told the first, "You're losing the signal here in the mall." She then pulled out her own cell phone and made a call. "Where you at? We're here at Dino's. Meet us in front."

Three scraggly young men came wandering up to the women. One of them had curly hair and an olive complexion. He was wearing a brown fake fur coat. He looked like a Tel Aviv pimp. castevet already heard this joke so she's excused from the rest of this post.

For some reason I thought to myself, "That boy is shoe shopping." Sure enough, a little later on, there he was, a Foot Locker bag in his hand. I don't know why I even bring this up.

Anyone else notice that the Border Patrol is advertising on television for new recruits? That can't be good.

Also on television, Tonya Harding. She doesn't look like she's been doing any ice skating lately. In fact, she looks like she may have chased down a few ice skaters and eaten them. I'm not trying to be mean I'm just saying the skater physique is gone, baby. I'm not sure why she's back on television or what she's trying to sell. When the whole Nancy Kerrigan thing was going on I lived just up the street from Tonya Harding. I kept hoping to see her fling another hubcap at her boyfriend or something, but no such luck.

That's all I've got. You can take me off your flist now.
  • Current Mood: random, I said
Well dammit. Your story of Nurse Talks A Lot has now created a small quagmire. When I ultimately find a significant other, it's going to be a tough choice between referring to him as 'my old man' or 'my (insert name)'.