They know not what they do

Yesterday a guy on IRC was saying he was currently hanging out in his house wearing t-shirt and boxer shorts. A woman asked him if his children were home?
"Yes", he said.
The woman replied that the single grossest thing her father ever used to do in front of her and her siblings was wear his boxer shorts around the house. Every female in the room chimed in with supporting comments like, "You go sista soljah!" and "Right on!" and "White power!" Remember, this is IRC.
So the guy protests, "But I'm wearing the kind with the holes sewed shut! They can't see anything!"
The woman says, "You'd be surprised what shows when you wear boxer shorts."

So - two things:
First, what's the grossest thing your father ever did? I'll tell you mine: My father used to eat Kellogg's Corn Flakes every day for breakfast. Every day. Without fail. But here's the gross; he used to tuck some of the chewed up corn flakes in his cheek and then spit it out into the dog's dish!!! And the dog would eat it!!!!!!! To this day I can't walk by a box of Corn Flakes in the grocery without barking at my shoes right then and there. Clean up on Aisle 4!
Second, I don't wear boxers. Way too loosey goosey for my enormous pillar of love. I wear those boxer briefs. Anyone wants to see me in my boxer briefs, send a self addressed stamped envelope to

Boxers or Briefs
c/o Seaslug of Doom
30 Rockerfeller Plaza
New York, NY 10112
  • Current Mood: union suit
sent and still waiting the photo