angry purple

Oh no! Not again.

In the Sun Valley Mall, in Concord CA, a fat little blond haired boy hollers, "I want chocolate!"

o rly?

Kiosks are springing up all over the mall. Inexplicably, just like in Pennsylvania, they seem to be run by Russians. Every kind of thing, identifiable and indistinguishable is sold at the kiosks.

A blond woman working one of the kiosks holds up a small floppy blue ... something.

"What is it?" she asks with a perky grin.

"I don't care." I reply with a smile.

"Thank you." she replies to my departing back, by which she means "Fuck you and the nag you rode in on, tovarisch.

In the center of the mall a winter display has been erected. Several giant plexiglas globes in the form of Christmas ornaments are scattered about. The largest globe rains plastic snowflakes. Children dash through them, firing off rapid exclamations in Spanish. In one of the lesser spheres, mannequins form a tableau showing a kindly grandfather reading to a group of boys and girls. Grampa's hand seems to slyly reach for little Billy's crotch under cover of the large picture book in his lap. Giant penguins are in the other Christmas orbs. The eerie frozen displays are like a natural history museum on Bizarro World. But it's really just a huge ad for the new film, Happy Feet. A sign entreats families to have their holiday pictures taken under a big Happy Feet logo. Another placard states that the display will remain until December 24th, after which it will no doubt make way for some Easter film like Mel Gibson's The Passion of the Christ 2, Electric Boogaloo

By now you know that the holiday season is approaching. If I wanted to be diplomatic i could say that I don't particularly appreciate this time of year. But to be frank, I loathe the holidays with every fiber of my being.

Don't expect civility until January.
  • Current Mood: horrified
a fat little blond haired boy hollers, "I want chocolate!"