seaslug

Has anyone ever told you that you look like that guy....

Today was celebrity look-a-like day, and I am proud to say that I am one of the celebrity look-a-likes.

People have often told me I look like John Lithgow, like Mike Farrell, like John Cleese. If you were to take those three gentlemen for a car ride, drove the car over a cliff into a quarry, making sure the car exploded into a big orange fireball in mid-air as it fell, so that the three celebrities were all smooshed together by the impact at the bottom, and then beat each of them with a bat afterwards, you would have me.

The second celebrity look-a-like in today's cavalcade is Jay Leno. There is a doctor in the hospital at which I work who is a dead ringer. That is, if Jay Leno were slightly overweight and drinking a quart of rye every night. Really, this guy could so be his brother it's not even funny.

Dr. Leno has a permanent expression on his face and you can read that expression like a newspaper every time someone sees him and their eyes light up. That expression says, "If you tell me I look like Jay Leno I will flay you alive and use your skin for a lab coat."

I'll see if I can get a picture of Dr. Leno with my cell phone next time I see him. I can already hear that conversation:

"Why did you take my picture?" he'll say.
"You know why." I will reply.
He'll then say, "You killed my father. Prepare to die." Oh wait, wrong fictional tale.

Our final celebrity look-a-like tonight is Comic Book Guy from The Simpsons! Yes, I saw his real life twin walking through the mall this afternoon. He was wearing a yellow and black cell phone, probably a Nextel, clipped to his front jacket pocket. It was like a combination mobile / police badge. It was ideally placed to be whipped off his jacket pocket and up to his ear before the first chords of whatever freakish ring tone he might have could echo and die. I also realized that, being the real life incarnation of Comic Book Guy, if he were to try and wear the phone at his waist it would be crushed in a microsecond in the gravity well created by his stomach.

Worst post EVAR!
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One time I took a class on Japanese anime and there was a guy who was a ringer for the Comic Book Guy, right down to the clothing and annoying commentary on Japanese anime.